Guess what, it's offensive to me too. In April of this year my 20 month old son was diagnosed with fragile X. Fragile X is one of the leading causes of 'developmental delays' - or as we called it in my day, mental retardation.
To have your baby diagnosed with this is inexplicable. The grief, sadness, horror, guilt; to look at my adorable son and know my genes caused it - the pain has been unbearable.
Since that day, I have been trying to survive. Trying to get through each day - parenting, working, living - not falling apart. That has been work enough. You'll never know how many people throw around the word "retard" until that word changes your world.
I hear that word - 'retard' 'retarded' - daily. My clients, coworkers, everyday literature, even my friends and family throw it around in daily conversation. Just like I did.
And EVERY time I hear that word - EVERY TIME - it is a punch in the gut. That word, used derogatorily, conjures up my beautiful son's face. I can't quite put that word and my son's face together. When he was diagnosed - the day a 2 minute phone call rocked my world - I put down the phone and thought "He's retarded. A retard. My son's retarded." It just kept going through my head, over and over, trying to reconcile the shock, that word, terror.
People complain that our society is too 'politically correct." I've been a social worker for 11 years, so political correctness doesn't bother me and much of it I feel is overdue.
But if you are reading this, I beg you to reconsider using that word. Don't punch me in the gut, my year has been bad enough.
Love your new blog, Quinn. :) And I'm glad you're taking a stand for Owen, your family, and others out there! I can't remember the last time I used this word or that other ubiquitous and just as disgusting one - "gay". Every time I hear one of the Real Housewives say "retarded" on national TV I cringe and can't even believe it. People sometimes need it pointed out to them to even be conscious that they're being so ignorant and insulting and I hope your new blog helps to make a difference. Keep writing! It's therapy! Love, D.
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